A Hand at Dusk
by LifeIChose
Summary: It's getting old, I know, I know.


**A/N**: I guess I should disclaim. So in case you thought otherwise, I don't own TVD or these characters.

I should also say, like most of my fics, I was inspired by a song. The song whose title I am using is by Swan Lake.

Love this song. Love Bamon. I feel like there are not enough Bonnie and Damon stories on here so I wrote one. Happy Reading.

* * *

><p>He heals.<p>

Klaus' blood, Stefan's sacrifice, it works and Damon is as good as new in a week's time.

Elena tries to stay away; tries to be the loyal girlfriend that she thought herself as before she kissed him. She could justify that one moment given that she thought he was dying but they both know her heart has not been loyal for a while.

She loves them both.

Stefan is out on a worldwide bender with Klaus and it is no longer really about her choosing.

Stefan made the choice for both of them. He chose his brother and now all Damon and Elena have is each other.

Sometimes it feels good.

If he kisses her with his eyes closed and his mind turned off.

Other times, most times, he can't help but think of Stefan.

Before Elena, before Katherine, there was him and his brother. And now he finally has the girl but he knows he would give her up in an instant to have Stefan's judgmental scowls and reprimanding words back.

* * *

><p>She tries with Jeremy. Fights for him harder than she has ever fought for anyone or anything before.<p>

It's not enough.

As a direct result of her actions to save him, there are competing forces for his attention now

"_What did you do?"_

"_I did it for you."_

Jeremy has always been fascinated by the supernatural. She knows that is part of what attracted him to her. She figures that she shouldn't be surprised that he picks two vampire ex-girlfriend ghosts over her.

She _is_ surprised though, both by his choice, and how much it hurts.

She loves him.

* * *

><p>Spring turns to summer and Alaric looks up from his whisky bottle long enough to notice that the Gilberts are a mess.<p>

He thinks about Jenna and what she sacrificed for them and knows he needs to make a change.

It takes a couple of weeks but he finally convinces Elena and Jeremy to take a break from Mystic Falls with him in the summer.

Damon knows Alaric expects him to object; to try and keep Elena by his side now that he finally has her but all it takes is for him to think of all the events that have transpired over the past few months to work with Alaric in convincing Elena and Jeremy that this is the right thing for them to do. For Jenna, for their parents and for themselves.

Elena whispers that she loves him before she leaves. It is something that she has never admitted to him before and he waits for the elation to come.

It doesn't.

* * *

><p>He runs into Bonnie while looking for an easy meal in the woods.<p>

She doesn't jump when he nuzzles his head into her neck, his right hand holding her head in place.

Her eyes open lazily and her legs spread out in front of her.

"Are you looking to get drained?" he asks, releasing her and bringing them both up so that they are standing facing each other.

She shakes herself away from him. "I was practicing."

"In the woods at dusk?"

She shrugs. "Why do you care?"

He takes in the dullness of her eyes and the flatness of her voice. "It's just you and me this summer."

"So?"

"We could be friends?"

She gives him an appraising look. "I'm not interested."

The rebuttal is predictable given Bonnie's feelings towards him but Damon finds that it stings and in that moment he realizes how alone he really is.

Even at his worst there was always Stefan and now just when he was trying, just when he was starting to grow a conscience, there is no one.

"Suit yourself," he replies evenly.

As the sky darkens Bonnie watches the spot Damon once was.

The loneliness that she has been fighting against by keeping herself busy with spells hits her then.

She thinks of her unanswered calls to either Gilbert, of having to hear of Caroline's summer vacation plans when Caroline was already on the way to the airport with her Mom, and tears spring to her eyes.

She sighs and doesn't bother wiping away the cascading tears.

Being sad: it's getting old.

* * *

><p>"I knew you would come crawling back," Damon says as he swings the door open.<p>

She rolls her eyes and steps around him. "You smell like a brewery."

"You smell like depression."

She glares at him. "Well I'm not the one crying into my bourbon."

"Believe me, it is better than crying into your pillow," he retorts strolling back into the living room.

Bonnie finds herself smiling softly as she follows him. It is nice to be around someone familiar, even if it is Damon.

"Bourbon?" he asks from the bar, his back turned to her.

Her instinct is to say no but her mouth has a different idea. "Sure."

Damon turns around to face her, the surprise clear on his face.

She walks over to him to prove she is serious.

He clinks her glass with hers once it is in her hands. "Here's to being pathetically alone."

There is no humour in his eyes.

She finishes the glass in one gulp.

* * *

><p>"I didn't come here for this," she says in the stillness of the dark.<p>

"Let me guess, this is the part where you say I took advantage of you and give me an aneurism," Damon says lazily.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees one shoulder lift up. "I'm too tired for that."

Damon, for once, is unsure of what to do. This is something he never expected and given that Bonnie has not looked at him since he rolled off her, he can't read the situation at all.

He feels her lifting off the bed and turns to face her.

"Can you not watch me get dressed?" she asks as she slips on her underwear, her back to him.

"Bonnie, I think it is a little late to get shy," he says in a suggestive voice that he knows will annoy her.

She just shrugs, however, and continues putting on her clothes.

Damon watches her, feeling increasingly uncomfortable.

Once she is done dressing, she makes her way to the door. She turns to face him then. "Thanks for the sex," she says.

Her words, like her eyes, are hollow.

He tries to smile but it is empty. "Anytime."

* * *

><p>"Jeremy is an idiot," Damon says one night in the bath.<p>

Bonnie's eyes flip open. "I think I've had enough soapy time."

She rises and dangles a towel in front of Damon. "Help me dry off," she asks with a sultry tone that he would have never expected from her but has now gotten used to.

It always works but this time he hesitates.

They have been sleeping together for a month and they have yet to talk about anything real.

It has been an unspoken agreement between them but over the past week he has found he wants to break it.

He wants to know more than her body.

The realization hits full force as he looks up at Bonnie's outstretched hand.

"Bonnie," he begins.

"Fine, I'll dry myself off," she interrupts.

He is up and lifting her before her feet can touch the ground.

Talking can wait.

* * *

><p>Bonnie watches him as he sleeps.<p>

She knows he is getting tired of her sidestepping any topic that is personal but she can't bring herself to do it.

It already feels like a large enough betrayal to Elena and Jeremy, and to herself, to have so easily given Damon her body, she can't imagine giving him any other part of herself.

She reasons that he hasn't given her any other part of himself either and she tries to tell herself that there isn't much else he could offer her even if he wanted to.

While she can't deny that Damon is more than the vampire sociopath that she once thought he was, she knows that the little good that is in him belongs to Elena.

The guilt: it's getting old.

* * *

><p>"It's almost over," she says against his chest one evening.<p>

They are lying on his lawn watching the sunset as they have done many evenings over the past couple of weeks.

It's one of the few personal things that she has let him in on: her love of sunsets and thunderstorms, and one that they have been sharing together since she let it slip.

"What is?" he asks.

It is a long moment before she answers. "Summer."

His hand clenches in the grass. "We still have a couple of weeks."

"It's not enough," she wants to say. Instead she kisses him deeply.

He reciprocates and flips them so he is on top of her.

"You are so damn beautiful," he whispers as his fingers slide under her dress to caress her thigh.

She reaches out to run a hand through his hair.

"So are you."

He laughs with a lightness he hasn't felt in a long time.

"I don't think anyone has ever called me that. Ruggedly handsome? Devastatingly gorgeous? Yes. But beautiful?"

Bonnie rolls her eyes at his conceit but stays serious. "You are beautiful to me."

* * *

><p>He is not surprised to find her gone when he wakes up the next day.<p>

Even though they have avoided talking about anything serious, he has come to know her well over the past three months by virtue of spending almost every single day together.

Ever since the second time they slept together, there is not a single day that he has not woken with her by his side.

Last night, however, as much as he tried to deny it, he could tell she was saying goodbye.

He'd never given much thought to Bonnie before, beyond what use she could be in saving Elena, but as soon as he had sex with her the first time, he knew that she was different than his other one night stands.

Damon reaches over to the empty half of his bed and inhales Bonnie's scent.

He should have never kept sleeping with her, he thinks to himself.

* * *

><p>He senses her before she makes her presence known.<p>

It takes all of his restraint to keep facing forward until she comes up to him.

"Hey," her greeting is warm but hesitant.

He turns to face her. "So Gilbert finally let you out of his sight?"

"He is in the car. I am just picking up an order."

"Ahh," Damon says in mock understanding. "I wonder what little Jeremy would do if he knew you were in here talking to me, or what we did all summer."

"Damon," Bonnie warns.

He takes a sip of his bourbon. "Oh don't worry Bon Bon, I won't tell if you don't."

Bonnie shakes her head and begins to move to the other end of the bar where her food order is.

"Why are you being an ass? You could have gotten back together with Elena, you said no."

Damon doesn't answer so Bonnie pays for her order and picks up the brown paper bag.

He grabs her hand as she walks past him.

"It wasn't right, me and Elena."

Bonnie swallows hard. "Because of Stefan?"

"Yes," he replies. "And because of you and me."

"Damon, the only reason we worked this summer was because no one else was around. It wasn't real."

Damon drops her hand like it burns. "Right, of course."

Bonnie tries not to look at him. "I'll see you around."

He murmurs a barely audible "Yeah," and returns to his drink.

She walks away, her heart heavy in her chest.

Doing the right thing: it's getting old.


End file.
